Taking It One Day At a Time

February 25th, 2010

I have realized in the last few months that when it comes to things with Ziva, we just have to take it one day at a time- hence the title. We have so many challenges with Ziva and so many obstacles to overcome, that if I start to think about the future, I get overwhelmed. So we have to just take each day as it comes and try not to worry about what the unknown future holds. A few people have encouraged me to write on the blog about the challenges we are facing so that they will know how to specifically pray for us. So here goes...

Our first and foremost concern is Ziva's speech. She now knows about 10-12 words and is using them without prompting. This is progess and we are grateful for it- but she will be 4 years old in a few months and is still speaking at about a one-year-old's level. The rate of her progress is also very slow; it takes her weeks to learn a new word (and that is after lots and lots and lots of practice!). Her lack of speech negatively affects so many other areas of her life- her relationships with others (us, teachers, classmates), her cognitive progress, her emotional development, etc etc. Her speech problem compounds all the other delays. We don't even want to think about how this will affect her ability to read in a few years.

School is another huge area of concern. We have decided to put Ziva in school 5 days a week next year. We figure the more she is in school, the more she will learn about correct social behaviours. She will be going to nursery school again, not JK; if she went to JK, she wouldn't be able to handle the demands and we would be required to provide a full time EA for her (at our expense!). The main issues at school involve her running all the time, running away from her teachers/the group, and not being able to sit or attend for any length of time. This is in addition to the fact that she is developmentally delayed and cannot speak/interact with her teachers or peers. She does not know how to interact with her peers appropriately and because she doesn't talk, they do not to play with her. It is a catch-22 situation.

The "running away" is a problem whenever we go out. If she is not in cart, you have to have a hand on her at all times. It is hard to describe how emotionally exhausting that actually is. Going to other people's houses is still very overwhelming for Ziva as well. At home, we find that she can be quite calm and she hardly runs. But as soon as we are at someone else's, she is like a wild animal let out of its cage. She gets completely out of control and cannot be calmed down. Needless to say, we don't go out with her very often!

Attachment continues to be an issue. We have seen some great progress over the last few months...but then she'll reach for a complete stranger for a hug and we take a few big steps back.
Instead of being supportive and simply doing what we ask, we find that we have to "convince" people that what we are doing for attachment is the right thing.

That about sums up the "big" issues that we are dealing with and for which we need prayer. As always, pray for patience and more patience...and a miracle!

I thought I'd share with you some of Ziva's favourite things too...

Ziva is becoming very affectionate towards Scott and I and loves to give us hugs and kisses. Sometimes she will just keep hugging and kissing us, over and over again. She also loves to snuggle with me in the morning when she has just gotten up. It's about the only time that she sits still enough to snuggle!

Ziva continues to love food. It still amazes us what this kid will eat and how much of it. She will try anything...grapefruit (which she loves), hot peppers, avacado, hummus...you name it, she'll try it. One of her favourite foods is dill pickles...which she eats like a cob of corn.

Ziva loves her "babies". She almost always has one in her arms! Here, she is putting the baby up against the wall; then she will go around the corner and say, "Baby, where are you?" (She says it well enough for us to understand.). She'll come around the corner and say, "There you are!" (She cannot really say this, but we know that is what she is trying to say.) Ziva absolutely loves music. If we put music on, all she does is sit in front of the stereo, mesmerized. She sings a ton, too.

Pudding is a favourite!

Ziva loves to do the laundry. She wants to get right in the action. When I am sorting laundry, putting clothes into the dryer, or clothes from the dryer into a hamper, she'll say, "Me, me" because she wants to help. She will even carry full laundry hampers around- man, is she a strong little thing!

Her new tent is just the perfect size for the two of us to play in...puzzles, colouring, dolls, blocks, you name it! Being in the tent is great, too, because there are minimal distractions for Ziva (she is very easily distracted.)!

January 28th: One year since Gotcha Day!